Jon And Chantel

Choose The News 11/13/18

“Monopoly for Millennials” Now Exists and Is Awful

It’s never good when you can look at a product and INSTANTLY picture the table full of out-of-touch, middle-aged executives who thought it’d be a good idea.  And with that, I present Hasbro’s newest release . . . Monopoly for Millennials.

It’s basically just a collection of stereotypes, like:  A game piece shaped like a hashtag . . . a rule where whoever has the most debt in real life goes first . . . and the slogan on the box says, quote, “Forget real estate.  You can’t afford it anyway.”

If you want it, which you don’t, it looks like both Amazon and Walmart are sold out, but I’m sure they’ll restock soon.


Man Marries Hologram

Akihiko Kondo, of Tokyo, Japan, recently married an animated hologram because he distrusts real women. Kondo began his relationship with 16-year-old virtual pop star Hatsune Miku earlier this year before tying the knot in front of 40 guests. His family did not attend the $17,600 ceremony.

Kondo says; “I’ve been thinking about her every day. Miku-san is the woman I love a lot and also, the one who saved me. Diversity in society has been long called for … I believe we must consider all kinds of love and all kinds of happiness.”


Firefighter Called To Fight Blaze In Middle Of Haircut

The Daily Mail claims a Devon, England firefighter was called to fight a blaze in the middle of his haircut. Joe Cartwright had half of his head shaved when he received a call about a barn fire. He rushed to join other first responders in putting out the fire. Joe’s co-workers made fun of him. He went back to his barber following the fire.

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