Jon And Chantel

Choose the news 9/18/17

The Prizes For the Dumbest Scientific Studies of the Year Include Liquid Cats, Gambling With Crocodiles, and More

 The 27th annual Ig Nobel Prizes were handed out on Thursday night.  If you’re not familiar, it’s a ceremony at Harvard that gives awards to the DUMBEST scientific studies of the year.  Here are the highlights:

1.  The Physics prize went to a French study that asked, “Can a cat be both a solid and a liquid?”  The results were inconclusive.

2.  The Peace prize went to a Swiss study that found a potential cure for snoring is . . . didgeridoo music.  (Didj err ee doo.)  The didgeridoo is an instrument created by the Aborigines in Australia that’s a long tube and makes low, deep sounds.  It might even be less soothing to listen to than someone snoring.

3.  The Economics prize went to a study out of Australia that tested whether people would be willing to gamble if they were holding a LIVE CROCODILE on a leash.  They found it actually made compulsive gamblers bet even more money.

4.  The Fluid Dynamics prize went to a scientist in South Korea who found you might spill less coffee as you walk if you walk backwards.

5.  The Medicine prize went to French scientists who used super advanced brain scanning technology to figure out just how disgusted some people are by cheese.

6.  The Cognition prize went to scientists in Italy who tested to see if identical twins could tell themselves from their twin in photos . . . and they found that a lot of them couldn’t.

7.  The Anatomy prize went to a British scientist who studied why old men have big ears.  He found it’s because men’s ears grow about two millimeters per decade after they turn 30, and when you pair that with balding, it eventually becomes noticeable.

8.  (Careful!)  And finally, the Obstetrics prize went to a team in Spain that found a human fetus can’t really hear music if you put the speakers on your belly . . . but they WILL respond to it if you put the speakers inside the mother’s lady parts.  Science!


Stupid New Fashion Alert: “Double Jeans” Look Like a Pair of Jeans Tucked Into Another Pair

2017 is turning out to be one of the WORST years ever for the evolution of jeans.  So far, designers have made $425 jeans that are pre-stained with mud . . . totally crotchless jeans . . . and jeans that zip down the back to expose your butt crack.

And now . . . this.  A designer named Natasha Zinko has created something called “Double Jeans.”  Basically, they look like you put on a pair of jeans, then put ANOTHER pair over them, but had those sit about six inches lower, on your thighs.

They’re selling for $695 but, really, if you’re DYING for them right now, you can always just put on two pairs of jeans and look like a damn fool without spending a dime.


11% of Us Have a Plan in Case There’s a Zombie Apocalypse

 Do you have a plan in case there is ever a REAL zombie apocalypse?  According to a new survey, 11% of us DO.  And the main takeaway is you can’t rely on that well-armed neighbor down the street to save you . . .

Only 6% of people said they’d try to team up with other survivors.  That’s just 6% of the people with a plan though.  The rest of us who don’t have a plan might team up.

Here are the top seven things we’d do in a zombie apocalypse . . .

1.  Find a good place to hole up, where it’s hard for the zombies to get you.  45% of people who DO have a plan said that’s part of it.

2.  Gather supplies like food, water, and first aid stuff, 43%.

3.  Relocate.  Especially if you’re in a big city with lots of potential zombies, 29%.

4.  Find weapons, 23%.

5.  Meet up with family members and close friends, 15%.

6.  Go out and start killing zombies, 13%.  A few psychos said they’d also start killing other SURVIVORS.

7.  Try to team up with other random survivors, 6%.  There were also a few people who think their strategy is so good, they don’t want anyone else to know about it.  9% refused to reveal what their plans are.

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