Choose The News 11/14/18

The Most Creative “Parenting Hacks” Include Hiding Vegetables in Food, Using Bribes, and Straight Up Lies

We’ve got the results here from a new survey about creative “parenting hacks.”  Really, they’re less “hacks” and more just LYING and DECEIVING their kids.  But hey, whatever works, I can’t judge.

Here are 10 of the best “hacks” parents use . . .

1.  Blending vegetables into other foods to get kids to eat them . . . like blending broccoli into ketchup or cauliflower into mac and cheese.

2.  Playing the “quiet game,” where the first person to talk loses.

3.  Bribing their kids . . . like offering candy if they finish their vegetables.

4.  Calling all meats “chicken.”

5.  Only charging the iPad to 35% to limit the kids’ time on it.

6.  Giving them a glass of juice that’s really half-juice, half-water.

7.  Telling them celery will give them superpowers.

8.  Telling them cavity monsters will get their teeth if they don’t brush.

9.  Setting their alarm to the music from their favorite video game so they wake up.

10.  Saying a bowl of broccoli is just for you, which makes them want it more.


Drink Your PBR Now, Because Pabst Is in Serious Trouble

There’s TERRIBLE news today for hipsters, steel workers, and everyone in between:  Pabst Blue Ribbon is on the verge of going EXTINCT.

Here’s what’s going on.  Pabst has something called a contract brewing deal with MillerCoors, where MillerCoors brews, packages, and ships its beer.  Pabst, and other smaller companies, just don’t have the infrastructure to do that themselves.

Pabst’s deal with MillerCoors started in 1999 and is scheduled to end in December of 2020 . . . and MillerCoors says they’ll only renew it for almost TRIPLE the price.

The only other company that could handle Pabst’s needs is Anheuser-Busch, but they don’t do contract brewing.

And Pabst says it has proof that MillerCoors is trying to extort them with the new deal because it will put Pabst out of business, so MillerCoors can grab a bigger market share.

So Pabst is suing MillerCoors to keep their contract deal.  The trial is going on in Milwaukee right now, and it’s scheduled to last until the end of the month.

And if Pabst loses . . . well, it seems like they won’t have any choice but to go out of business.


Cops Stop Fred Flintstone For Speeding

The Orlando Sentinel claims Pasco County, Florida sheriff’s recently stopped ‘Fred Flintstone’ for speeding. Don Swartz, of Wesley Chapel, was wearing Fred’s signature orange and black outfit when officers stopped him for driving too fast through a residential neighborhood. His Smart car has been customized to look like the Flintstones car. Don did not say where he was headed

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