Stupid Is, Stupid Does

A Guy Got Dragged to a Wedding Where He Did’t Know Anyone,  So He Got Drunk and Did $30,000 in Damage

Have you ever been someone’s date at a wedding where you didn’t know anyone? It’s awful, right? Well, be proud that you handled it more maturely than this guy. 26-year-old Alex Rees of Manchester, England got dragged to a wedding in September by his girlfriend. She was a bridesmaid, but he didn’t know anyone. So he did the natural thing: He got hammered. Unfortunately he’s not good at handling alcohol, and he wound up going on a rampage. He smashed a bunch of cars in the parking lot, crushed a bunch of lights and plants, then pushed his girlfriend into a bush. And when that was all done, he started smearing poop on the walls. It’s not clear if it was his poop or maybe dog poop he found outside or something, but we’re not sure it matters. He did a total of $30,000 in damage. He was in court this week facing five counts of criminal damage and one count of assault. He had a prior assault conviction, so he was just sentenced to one year and four months in prison. Get more here.

A Man Trying to Rob a House Accidentally Locked Himself in the Bathroom

45-year-old Kenneth N. Rogers, of Florida went out robbing last week. Only one of the homes he broke into had an alarm system. He ignored it, and went on robbing. The police eventually responded to the house, because that’s what alarms are for,and when they arrived the alarm was still going off. They noticed the porch roof was damaged, and looked  inside to see Ken plundering through the kitchen cabinets and refrigerator. He was armed with a kitchen knife and wearing only a towel, because he was preparing to take a shower. The damage to the floor and ceiling of the home was the result of Ken accidentally locking himself in the  bathroom and trying to get out. He was charged with burglary of a structure while armed and criminal mischief. Get more here.



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