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Stupid Is, Stupid Does

Package Thieves To-Do List Listed “Shop Lift” As a Task

Kristina Green, 19, and Gary Withers, 38, aren’t very clever criminals. An Amazon delivery driver called the cops when he noticed Dodge Charge following him, stealing the packages he was delivering. He stayed on the phone with authorities until they arrived and pulled the car over. The two had stolen mail and packages from thirteen homes, hauling away people’s Christmas gifts, including a brand new iPhone, police said. When cops searched the car, they discovered the stolen parcels, along with drugs and a loaded gun. Both Green and Withers were already on probation for theft, narcotics and weapons violations, deputies said. They also each had to-do lists, Kristina’s had “shop lift” on hers, along with other tasks including: “Kiss mom n tell her she’s loved : ).” Gary also had a list, his had directions to a shooting range and tactical gear outlet, and locations for nearby FedEx and UPS mailboxes. They are being chareged with possession of methamphetamine, possession of heroin, a felon in possession of a handgun and possession of stolen property. Get more here.

A Guy Got Busted for Shoplifting at a ‘Shop with a Cop’ Event

A bunch of state troopers in Morehead, Kentucky took part in a charity event this week called “Shop with a Trooper.” (Morehead is about 60 miles east of Lexington.) It’s one of those things where they buy Christmas presents for underprivileged kids. And they were shopping at a Walmart on Monday, when one of the underprivileged kids’ DADS tried to steal a power drill. They haven’t released his name, and it’s not clear why he thought shoplifting from a Walmart filled with COPS was a good idea.But employees caught him trying to sneak out of the store with it, and the cops who were already there arrested him. A police spokesman called the whole thing appalling, but said they made sure it didn’t ruin the event, and all the kids still got their presents. Get more here.

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