Stupid Is, Stupid Does

Two Shoplifters Stole $500 Worth of Bibles

If you’re gonna steal something, at least make sure it’s not widely available for FREE all across America. Cops in West Springfield, Massachusetts are looking for two guys who shoplifted from a Christian bookstore last month. According to the store’s website, they sell a wide variety of artwork and DVD’s. But apparently the two guys didn’t touch any of that stuff, they just stole eight copies of the Bible. So the whole afterlife thing probably just got a little tougher for them. Plus it was the one thing in the store you can get at basically any hotel. Just check the drawer next to your bed. The Gideon people actually want you to take them. The owners of the store say they’re out about 500 bucks though. And the cops haven’t found the guys yet, so they posted two screenshots from the security footage. And they’re hoping someone might recognize them and come forward. Get more here.

A Guy Tries to Run From the Cops and Gets Exhausted After 100 Yards

Some people just don’t have the cardio to be good criminals. A 47-year-old guy named Christopher Cole in Laurel Hill, Florida had a warrant out for his arrest. And on Monday, a cop went to his place to look for him. When Christopher saw him, he took off running. But unfortunately for him, he’s in terrible shape, and he was so exhausted after sprinting for 100 yards that he collapsed. When the cop searched him, Christopher had meth on him, and he had even more in his truck. So he was arrested for drug possession, resisting arrest, and possession of drug paraphernalia. Get more here.

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