Stupid Is, Stupid Does

A Man Breaks Into a House and Claims He Co-Owns It With Mariah Carey?

The police in Holmes Beach, Florida got a call on Sunday morning about a guy breaking into a house.  And when they got there, they found 35-year-old Jason James inside, just chillin’, listening to music, and drinking a beer. He told them it was all a misunderstanding.  He said he’s lived in the house for 17 years, and he co-owns it, with Mariah Carey. Last we heard, Mariah didn’t own any beachfront property in central Florida, and she certainly doesn’t co-own anything there with a dumpy redheaded dude.  Although she is so unpredictable, right? The cops quickly looked into it and believe it or not, it turns out neither James or Mariah owns the house.  We’re also pretty sure he’s never met Mariah or done any real estate deals with her. He was arrested for burglary of an unoccupied dwelling. Get the full story here.

Man Selling Magazine Subscriptions Tried to Rob Resident with a Fake Gun

He said he had magazines to sell, then the 31-year-old man pulled a fake gun and tried to rob an eastside Salt Lake City apartment dweller. The suspect gained entry to a secured apartment complex at 130 S. 1300 East at about 8:45 p.m. by following a resident through a security door. The man then went to the fourth floor with his bogus magazine pitch, and when his intended victim allowed him inside to write out a receipt, the suspect pulled the weapon, what turned out to be a toy replica of a handgun. The suspect demanded the apartment dweller’s wallet and laptop computer. Instead, the two ended up in a scuffle. A neighbor, hearing calls for help, helped subdue the suspect and hold him until police arrived. Police found the counterfeit firearm, broken on the floor. The suspect was arrested and booked into the Salt Lake County jail, where he remained without bail Monday on suspicion of aggravated robbery. Get the full story here.

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