Stupid Is, Stupid Does

A Guy Killed a Chicken Every 15 Minutes Until His Mother Called His Girlfriend’s Parents to Fix His Relationship?

18-year-old Haden Smith of Elkmont, Alabama has been having a lot of trouble with his girlfriend.  And on Thursday he decided to handle it the way all mature grown-ups do. He asked his mother to call his girlfriend’s parents and work it out for him. When she wouldn’t do it, he raised the stakes, and threatened to kill one of her chickens every 15 minutes until she did. She called his bluff, but that was a mistake.  He killed six chickens over the course of an hour-and-a-half before his mom made a call, to the cops. He was arrested for domestic violence and criminal mischief. There’s no word on how his relationship is doing. Get the full story here.

Man Throws Furniture at Barbecuing Neighbor

A man was grilling on his patio when his neighbor, who lives above him, complained about the fumes coming into his apartment. The man chose to ignore his neighbor because of the neighbor’s drunken belligerence. The neighbor retorted by throwing a stool and chair down to the patio.  A few minutes later, the man heard a knock at his door, it was his neighbor, demanding his stool and chair back, and threatening to burn his apartment down. When officers spoke with the upstairs neighbor, he thanked them for their service “approximately 15 times,” according to reports. “As he lit a cigarette, he stated that the grill smoke bothers him,” the officer wrote. “He agreed that throwing items off his balcony towards his neighbor was a mistake. When asked about his threatening to burn the apartment down, he stated that he meant his neighbor’s careless use of the grill could cause a fire.” Get the full story here.

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