Choose the news 4/10/18

Your Entire Relationship Hinges on Who Does the Dishes

Your relationship or marriage is depending on whether or not you leave that dirty plate in the sink or rinse it off.  Literally.

According to a new study out of the University of Utah, your entire relationship hinges on who does the dishes.

The researchers found that women do more of the chores around the house, especially the really soul-crushing ones like cleaning the toilets and doing the endless flow of laundry . . . but doing the dishes is the one chore that REALLY breaks their spirit.

So when her significant other pitches in and handles the dishes, it makes everything better.  Those couples are happier, their relationships are more stable, they argue less, and they even have better SEX.

So . . . um . . . just do the dishes.


Five Misused Phrases That Make You Sound Dumb

Here are five phrases people misuse all the time that can instantly make you sound dumb . . .

1.  “For all intensive purposes.”  The correct way to say it is, “For all intents AND purposes.”  “Intents” as in intentions.

2.  “I could care less” should be “I COULDN’T care less.”  If you COULD care less, that means you DO care about something.  If you couldn’t, then you don’t care at all.

3.  “One in the same” should be “one AND the same.”  It’s a minor difference, and you might be able to get away with it.  But technically, “one IN the same” is wrong.

4.  “Tongue and cheek” should be “tongue IN cheek.”  It’s literally describing a facial expression people make when they’re joking.  Like if you were trying not to laugh and pushed the side of your cheek out with your tongue.

5.  “Jive with” should be “JIBE with.”  “Jibe” means to be in agreement with something.  “Jive” is a type of dance, or a way of speaking.  (Like the old woman who speaks jive in the movie “Airplane”.)

People started using the word “jive” in the 1920s.  And according to Merriam-Webster, they started confusing it with “jibe” almost immediately.  So don’t worry too much if you mess that one up.


Monkeys Thwart Zoo Theft

An attempted squirrel monkey theft at The Wellington Zoo in New Zealand was recently foiled after the monkeys fought back. The zoo believes someone used bolt cutters to break into the enclosure after hours, but was scared off when the monkeys began defending themselves. A spokesman says; “[The monkeys]are all doing well and we’re keeping them all together so they can support each other while they settle back into their daily routine. We’ll be keeping a close eye on them over the next few days.”



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